Why friends are always better...

Today I had the great opportunity to have lunch with three friends. These folks started out as being part of some of the same professional networking groups and now we have just kind of evolved into more of a friendship relationship.

Today I learned from this group of friends that:

One has a husband that needs a special type of prescription medicine just to stay alive

One has a husband that shops at Aldi and loves it

One took her soon to be ex-husband's pristine vet out for an afternoon drive in a driving rain and mud storm and let it set for three days so the mud would get nice and solidly set all over it. (note to self, don't ever "unfriend" this friend!)

I learned about their other social activities, what other groups they are in and how they spend their free time.

I learned that one doesn't like to force smiles all the time, because she doesn't want to be fake. I learned that each of them has in their past the opportunity to stand up for themselves in business and did so with lots of class.

We didn't "pass" any business today, there was no pressure to fill out slips, sign attendance sheets or be accountable for or to any weird networking rules. It was just plain fun. We were just being ourselves. We really learned about how we could help each other. We made suggestions and had great, honest discussion about our businesses.

I have done business with two out of the three friends and will look for ways to do business with all of them. Not because of a sense of obligation but because on a Monday they took time out of their business day to have lunch and just chat.

It was great fun and I am looking forward to the next time we get together. At the end of the lunch we didn't all whip out our calendars and set our next date...we simply left each other with a see you soon, have a great week departure.

Yes, we will definitely be getting back together soon, no doubt about it....that's what friends do. And in business friend relationships are always the better relationship to have! You can move mountains when you have friends - they are always better!

Breaking Up is Hard to Do....

Last week I had to make the decision to leave the BNI group that I joined last year. Because of the great new directions my coaching business is now going in, it was going to be difficult to maintain a good attendance record. It was either leave now or end up being asked to leave because of not being able to attend or find subs. It would not have been fair to me or the group to continue so I decided better to leave now.

The choice seems like an obvious one and one that I knew I was going to have to make. But in thinking this through I thought of a couple other organizations that I really need to let go of, some business connections that I needed to give up on that never really "connected" and some extra-curricular activities that were just becoming time stealer's. In one 48 hour time period I was able to clean up a bunch of these items and end some things that were just in need of ending.

Sometimes we have to do that. Not long ago friend and fellow blogger Angie Weid blogged about what it can mean to your life to just learn how to say, "NO." This is so true and in my case it was just learning how to say - "good-bye" to some of those things that for whatever the reason, you just have to say good-bye to.

So what types of things do you need to say good-bye to? If you "broke it off" with these things would that leave more time in your schedule to build your business, pursue your goals and dreams?

Breaking up is hard to do, but sometimes it means that there are even greater plans and successes that lie ahead.

What's up with People?

Lately I have been noticing that people are not as friendly to each other as they normally are. Many people I have talked to have been frustrated due to the weather, uncertain economic times, life events that have taken a not so good turn. All of this frustration seems to be coming out in the oddest of places. I am seeing a side of people that just doesn't seem to be, well, NICE.

In exploring this observation with a friend, she stated she thought it was that is was March. Yes, apparently the month of March is just that time of the year when people act out. Is this true? Is there some weirdness about the month of March that causes otherwise nice, courteous, professional business people to turn into something totally the opposite?

Is it because this is a transition month? End of winter, beginning of Spring? Filing of taxes and officially "closing out" the previous year? Kids on or getting ready for Spring break and the last stretch of the school year? Time in the business year when we start to look at the first quarter and wonder if our business was any better off than this time last year?

What is it about March?
OH - it could be the Madness...NCAA basketball brackets are out. Maybe your favorite team didn't make it? Or maybe you don't have a fav team and all this focus on something such as college basketball is a complete waste of time, talent and energy.

Whatever it is - I hope it passes quickly and April gets here soon... I know I sure could use the change in attitudes!

Networking - Pros and Cons

Is your networking group filled with a bunch of pros or a bunch of cons?

Do you attend professional networking groups and meetings that are filled with sincere networking professionals that know the value of those relationships...

OR

Are your networking groups filled with a bunch of con artists that are there just for the food and to see how many business cards they can hand out or collect. Are they there to gather "prospects" to fill their data bases for some generic marketing effort?

Do you even attend networking events at all?

I am pondering this question after having time to consider what happened a couple of weeks ago to me as I invited a couple business acquaintances to my BNI visitor day. Now I understand that small business people are busy - particularly independent small business owners that also juggle jobs, family, kids, school, etc. So I am not picking on people that are "too busy."

But some of the responses I got when I asked people to join me were just plain - funny.

• "Those things never interest me. It's always the same people over and over. Why would I want to build a relationship with them?"


• "I have to spend time working on my business, I don't have time to add another activity to my to-do list."


• "I don't have the money to join those groups."


• "It's too early in the morning..."


• "I don't have my new business cards printed yet."


• "My business is growing so fast...I don't have time."

Those were just a few. I am wondering if you knew that you were going to a meeting with professional networking people if it would make a difference if you attended or not. I bet it would.

Today's coaching directional...look for real professional networking groups to belong to. Pick two or three that you can attend monthly, be sure they are filled with quality people and not con-artist networkers. And when a fellow business associate invites you to attend, don't make up an excuse like those above. You just never know who your business friend wanted you to meet in their group or who you might have met through another connection made at the meeting!

Fear of Change...It's 2008 Get Over It!

A bit of a rant for today that needed to get out of my brain....

I am so tired of hearing about how people fear change! And I don't mean the kind of change that rattles around in a plastic cup sitting on the dresser in your bedroom waiting to be taken to the Coin Star machine at Kroger's either. That kind of change has funded some very nice vacations!

This is the kind of fear of change that paralyzes organizations from achieving their full potential and living out their vision. I am convinced that you can do all the vision and mission planning in the world but if you are afraid of changing your organization to live out your mission then your mission statement is worth less than the paper it is printed on. And certainly not worth the cost of having it framed and displayed in every office in your company or printed on every piece of marketing material.

It's 2008 - listen carefully. You cannot allow yourself or others in your organization fear change. This is not simply about embracing change...I mean you really have to get over the fear and using the fear of change as an excuse as to why something should or should not be done.

Change is going to happen whether you like it or not. Change comes in every second, of every minute, of every day of the year. STOP letting fear of change dictate your organization's life.

Fear of change is not what you want leading the direction your organization is going in.
Plain and simple.
Just stop the fear.
STOP!